Script Revision & Location/Actor Details

Still screening actors.

Christopher = Aaron Radney

Clare = Caroline Huss (tentative)

Locations:

Interrogation room, front of house, garage view, balcony

Summary: Chris comes to get revenge on man who set him up to take his wife’s life. In background he has already knocked out guards on he lawn. He then rings the door bell. Holland innocently opens door. Is greeted with a punch to the face which means lights out. Rich man wakes up tied to a chair. Chris interrogates him. We see little bits and pieces of what’s going on through tiny flashbacks. All the while, we slowly piece together what has really happened. At the end, the rich man frees himself discretely. Chris turns his back for a moment, and Holland tries to choke Chris from behind, but when the rich guy closes his grip around Chris’s neck, he hardly manages to get a firm hold before Chris bends back Holland’s arm, turns around and ends him. Chris gives him a long slightly troubled look before walking out of the shot. Cut to black.

SCRIPT:

Main Characters

Christopher Hilshire

Clare Hilshire

Francis R. H. Holland

Secondary characters and extras

Secretary

Guard 1 & 2

Locations

Large House

Office Interior

By Celia Mitchell

ACT I:

Opens with a hand reaching for the doorbell in the daytime. Two guards are lying motionless on the lawn.

Inside the house: Holland walks toward the door, seeming to expect someone else. Opening the door without much thought, Holland is promptly greeted with a swift punch to the face.

Fade to Black

ACT II:

Holland wakes up tied to a chair in his living room. Chris is standing in the same room, looking out a window. Chris looks back at Holland.

CHRIS

You’re awake…

HOLLAND nervously looks around the room.

CHRIS turns his whole body to face HOLLAND

CHRIS

There’s no need to be afraid. I’m not going to do anything to you… yet…

HOLLAND catches his last word, the fear on his face increasing.

CHRIS gives him a calm, cold smile. CHRIS takes a seat across from HOLLAND, looking oddly at ease.

CHRIS

Tell me Mr. Holland, what is it that you actually do?

HOLLAND looks suspiciously at CHRIS

CHRIS’s tone of voice suddenly changes to quite deep and serious. His eyes become immediately cold.

CHRIS

Don’t be shy now.

HOLLAND

[nervously] I work for… Galman security.

CHRIS

And what do you do there?

HOLLAND

I issue orders.

CHRIS

Orders? Orders of what kind?

HOLLAND frustrated glares at Christopher.

HOLLAND

Look, what do you want from me? Who the hell are you? And where are my guards?

CHRIS

You’re guards are currently detained. You haven’t answered my last question. What orders?

HOLLAND

I issue assassination warrants at the request of the state.

Cut to: Office scene. CHRIS’s office is lit solely by a lamp on his desk.

A file slides over to CHRIS’s side of the desk. He looks up a secretary.

CHRIS

What’s this?

SECRETARY

Orders came in for you. It’s a private mission. They’ve requested you go alone this time. Some doctors have been passing information and medicine to the rebels.

CHRIS looks briefly inside the file, shuffling through a couple pages, looking troubled.

CHRIS

Geeze, not even any target info.

SECRETARY

Nope. Just eliminate everyone inside.

Cut to LIVING ROOM.

CHRIS

Who gives you the authorization to issue these warrants?

HOLLAND

I don’t know…

CHRIS hits Hilshire across the face with his fist.

CHRIS leans with inches of HOLLAND’s face.

CHRIS

Who give you your orders?

HOLLAND

I told you. I don’t know. I don’t have the clearance.

CHRIS clearly unhappy glares into HOLLAND’s eyes for a moment. Leaning away from HOLLAND, CHRIS passes in a circle around HOLLAND’s chair.

CHRIS

What was the last mission you issued?

HOLLAND

What does that have to do with this?

Cut to brief flashback:

CHRIS is holding a woman in his arms, kneeling on the floor, rocking back and forth.

CHRIS

[whispers] Clare…

CHRIS takes off her wedding ring. Visibly still very distraught.

CUT to LIVINGROOM.

CHRIS’s eyes flash angrily toward HOLLAND.

CHRIS

Answer the question!

HOLLAND

But I don’t underst—

CHRIS

Tell me!

HOLLAND

Oh fine! It was for this group of traitors. I was told to have them eliminated because they were a threat to the state. Happy?

CHRIS has regained control on his emotions.

CHRIS

Why was there nothing in the mission profile?

HOLLAND

I was told that it wouldn’t benefit the mission in any way, so I left unnecessary details.

CHRIS

Unnecessary details…

Brief pause.

CHRIS

One of those details was the name of a woman I loved…

Cut to BALCONY: CHRIS pulls Clare into his arms.

CUT to LIVINGROOM:

HOLLAND stares at CHRIS, gradually freeing his hands from the bonds tying him to the chair.

HOLLAND

But you eliminated a threat to your country, that should make you happy all the same.

CHRIS projects an angry glare at HOLLAND

CHRIS

She… was my wife. And I killed her with my own hands…

HOLLAND

Wait, you… you’re the…

CHRIS

I’m glad you understand now.

CHRIS turns to the window.

CHRIS

Just answer one more thing.

HOLLAND is silent.

CHRIS

Why did it have to be me?

HOLLAND flinches.

HOLLAND

Because Christopher Hilshire is the best of the best.

ACT III:

HOLLAND frees himself. Taking the opportunity with CHRIS’s back turned, he lunges forward to choke CHRISTOPHER. HOLLAND’s arms begin to take hold of CHRIS’s neck.

HOLLAND

How much was her life really worth anyway, huh?!

CHRIS grabs his arm, peels it back from his neck, immobilizes HOLLAND and snaps HOLLAND’s neck.

CHRIS looks down at the body that has just fallen to the floor.

CHRIS

Far more than yours…

CHRIS turns and walks out of shot.

END

Script - Rough Draft

By Celia Mitchell

Main Cast:

Christopher Hilshire (Main character – assassin)

Clare Hilshire (Christopher’s wife)

Francis Ray Henry Holland [Francis R. H. Holland] (boss man)

Secondary Cast:

Rose (assassin partner #2)

Andrew Percy (assassin partner #3)

Doctor 1 & 2

Patient 1 & 2

Locations:

Nice House

Old building/old house

Scene 1:

We see Christopher driving with an unwavering expression on his face.

Cut to flash back:

A door slams to the floor, and two doctors look up at CHRISTOPHER and the rest of his team. The nearest doctor (DOCTOR 1) with only a chart in his hand, rises to his feet. ROSE intercepts DOCTOR 1, then goes for the patient (PATIENT 1) of the second doctor (DOCTOR 2) who is now on her feet. ANDREW goes after DOCTOR 2 and kills him. Christopher goes after the third doctor (CLARE) near the center of the room. When the patient (PATIENT 2) attempts to fight back, CHRIS kills him. He moves on to the doctor. As the doctor is about turn around, Chris takes the doctor’s head in his hands and twists forcefully.

Cut to car:

The shot of his face is closer now. We can only see the frowning expression on his face. His hands twist uncomfortably on the wheel.

Cut to flashback:

The doctor he has just killed, falls backwards into his arms, dead. We see CLARE’s face. For a split second, we see the wedding ring on her finger. A fearful expression is on Chris’s face as the situation sinks in.

CHRISTOPHER

“Clare?”

He is answered by an eerie silence.

CHRISTOPHER

Clare? Clare! CLARE!

Cut to:

He is back in the car. The vehicle has come to a stop. He get out and shuts the door behind him.

Cut to:

CHRIS walks up driveway to where FRANCIS R. H. HOLLAND is leisurely going about his day, doing yard work. HOLLAND, originally with his back to CHRIS, turns to see CHRIS approaching.

We see a flash of Chris’s profile papers, along with a visual mission log, with a clear title, describing what the mission entailed.

HOLLAND runs away, into the house at the sight of CHRISTOPHER.

CHRISTOPHER takes chase. A lengthy battle of hide and seek ensues as CHRISTOPHER chases HOLLAND around the house.

At last, CHRISTOPHER catches HOLLAND. After a moment of CHRISTOPHER using his hand-to-hand combat skills, he beats HOLLAND to the floor.

CHRISTOPHER flings his wife’s ring at HOLLAND.

CHRISTOPHER

You did this!

FRANCIS R. H. HOLLAND

I did nothing.

CHRISTOPHER

Exactly. You issued the order to have her killed. You couldn’t even get your own hands dirty. You had to make it so that I would be the one taking Clare’s life.

CHRISTOPHER punches HOLLAND.

HOLLAND

I told you I don’t do anything…

CHRISTOPHER

I don’t believe you.

HOLLAND

I’ll call the police!

CHRISTOPHER

I am the police.

CHRISTOPHER punches HOLLAND again. HOLLAND’s voice begins to crack.

HOLLAND

I… I—

CHRISTOPHER

The next words out of your mouth better be, “I’m sorry.”

HOLLAND

Wait. Wait. I have money. I can pay you. You’ll be set. You won’t ever have to work as an assassin again!

CHRISTOPHER is silent.

HOLLAND

How much was she worth? I can give you twice the amount!

CHRISTOPHER kills HOLLAND.

CHRISTOPHER

You wouldn’t be able to afford it.

CHRISTOPHER walks toward the camera out of the frame.

END

ALT ENDING: Holland: How much was she worth? I can give you twice the amount!

Christopher

You wouldn’t be able to afford it.

Christopher kills Holland.

Revised Storyline

Theme: The Chase (Cat & Mouse)

Experiment of telling a story through action, rather than narrative.

Idea: Christopher gets back at the man who set him up to kill his own wife.

Act I - Christopher drives with constant flashbacks to the mission where his wife was killed.

Act II - Christopher arrives at boss's home. Boss already knows who he is, and can guess why he is there. He runs. Christopher chases him.

Act III - Christopher catches the guy and kills him.

Final Pitch

Locations:

- Doctor’s shack

- Empty Room/Library

- office

- office 2

- house

Main Characters:

- Christopher Hilshire

- Andrew

- Vailese

- Clare (wife)

- Rose

Extras:

- 2 doctors

- 1 citizen

- 2 guards/officers

- desk secretary

Background Info:

Why do they kill?

Unfortunately, nightly battles between rebels and the upper class have incurred casualties on both sides. Because of this, the police become more and more loyal to the government, as the rebels attempt to cover their losses by targeting deeper and stronger. Because of growing up in this environment, it’s and honor to reach the level of assassin in the rank of police for the elite law enforcement agent.

How do they know whom to kill?

Much like today’s world, a judge issue warrants. The kinds that are issued to this elite assassin’s unit though are called Elimination Warrants, and they are the only ones who receive them. Many times, it is specified on the warrant, who is to be killed. On those occasions, the authorization of other casualties is not acceptable. However, there are occasions where an order is given and all that is written is the location and an order to “eliminate all.” The opening to this movie is just such a case when names are not listed on the mission profile.

What exactly is Vailese?

Vailese is the equivalent of an NPC or caretaker unit within a vastly advanced version of the Internet. Unlike a common NPC though, Vailese can build relationships with human people, and think well enough individually to give a rational answer to a question. Information can be obtained by her, or other web units like her, while the human user experiences a conversation-like experience in virtual reality. The more secluded parts of the web where private conversations are held, are really not as secluded as one might think. Any information spoken in the web is subject to collection by Vailese and other like units. Because of this, rebels tend to stay far away from the web when discussing their affairs.

Why do the rebels care?

Rebels are simply the product of common people who have been burned a few too many times, and perhaps all too aware of their circumstances for their own good. While everything may appear peachy on the outside, since citizens seem to live normal lives… the truth is that the government slowly picks off the things it can get at, one by one. When the government was first installed, homeless citizens disappeared off the streets overnight. Many people assumed that the government had found them lodging, food, and jobs. In a way they had. All those things were satisfied. The difference, though, was that, they were neither paid, nor allowed to leave. Normal crime also appeared to vanish, but this had yet another ploy. Normal citizens caught alone at night were known to disappear. This had to do with yet another part of the government called the Night Division. The name was simple, so the cover was that they were simply nightly patrols. Rumors among the common people, however, inferred that the people who disappeared were sold to labs for disease testing. For normal citizens alike, good healthcare is also non-existent.

How do the rebels act?

By day, rebels act as normal citizens with normal jobs. At night though, they set the city ablaze. Ezra is probably the exception to every rule. She lives a double life—one under the name of Rose, who is one of the three assassins in Christopher’s unit, and the other who is Ezra, the rebel leader. She leads from the sidelines and through espionage, which is why the elite authorities haven’t recognized her face. But because of her sideline approach, she often isn’t really the main one leading the front. Even so, the final decision in important matters is hers. She lives in wealthy society on her days working, and bombs it on her days off. Each meeting place is designated through word of mouth, never through written means.

---

Act I: In a society with a single global government, the assassin Christopher Hilshire and his unit (Andrew and Rose) take out a small group of treacherous doctors (yes, with guns) who have been treating rebels and citizens alike. After killing these doctors, the other two in his group excuse themselves to report in. Christopher stays to collect evidence and insure that they’re dead. As he walks up to the first doctor and feels her pulse, he recognizes the wedding ring on her finger, confirming that she is dead. He pauses, removing her surgical mask, fearfully. When he recognizes her, he loses it, completely unaware that the video feed from the implants in his eyes is still recording. We cut to him in a shell-shocked stated. He takes the wedding ring off her finger, closing his hand around it, and sound goes on around him. His radio is going off, but he doesn’t hear it. He mulls over what has just happened.

Act II: Cut to a picture of him sitting at a desk. Someone has just slammed down a file on his desk, waking him from his living nightmare. The woman in front of him asks him if he’s filed his mission report yet, to which he doesn’t reply. She tells him to get to it and leaves. He starts typing a detailed report, but doesn’t get far, backspacing each time until he’s back to an empty page. He then eventually types out a very simple, bare basics report and sends it. Instantly, he gets a message back to the effect of, “You can’t lie to me! I saw it all. Your video feed was on the whole time.” Then a brief pause before he receives another message, “I know how you must feel. Come meet me…” (Yes, this computer can understand, because it just does).

Christopher hooks up with interface, plunging him into the virtual world that is the computer woman Vailese (who thinks for herself). She turns off his monitored audio and video signals, and asks what she can do to help. He tells her that he wants to look for the person who sent him the order. Because he was married to her, they have personal file relating to all police families on an encrypted server. Her info is among them. Vailese can tell him everything about Clare, right down to what her blood type and what she ate for breakfast this morning, but when she gets to the bottom of the list, it just says that Clare is dead, and that the assignment was designated by “unknown party.” She says that the source is password protected. Chris is devastated. Vailese comes up with the idea to track an IP address for the computer encrypting the data. It leads her to an address, which she then hands over to Christopher.

Act III: Christopher shows up at the address. He goes to the location alone at night. Uses the voice recording implants to tell Vailese to cut off the recording devices, which in turn also cuts him off from access to her help. While he’s there looking for the computer, he sees two guards (government enlisted) and a single janitorial staff member (obviously part of the common people). The janitor is cleaning the floors with a sponge, physically getting down on his hands and knees. The guard makes a threat about bringing down the “guys from that mission today” to set the man straight. Chris, who is hiding, starts to really listen. A brief mention of Chris and his ability to take out a high-ranking hospital official, who was a traitor (his wife), finally brings him over the edge, as the guard beats the man. Chris walks out from his hiding place, stopping the beating with a single well-placed hand. He then proceeds to ask about where the computer is that relates to the mission they were just talking about. The guard refuses to say anything, so Chris kills him (with his bare hands, because he hadn’t originally planned to kill anyone). He then turns to the next guard and asks the same question. That guard shows him the computer. With on hand on the guy’s neck, pressing his head against the desk, and another typing frantically at the keyboard, he asks the guard questions: starting with the password. The guy refuses to give it to him, so he clams the guard’s head down on the table. The guard complies, giving him the password slowly. The file gives a person (which he writes down), but not a location. He asks the guard when the location is, but the guard days he doesn’t know. The guard is wearing an item relating to the location, in plain sight, so as soon as the guard lies, he kills him too. (“Wrong answer.”) Cut to black. We then see, keys, a bus pass/passport, and a Swiss army knife being picked up off the table.

Basic Character Profiles

Christopher Hilshire – age 26. When he was younger, his father was one of the many to remember the first established government on the planet Lore. As a result, he was also established in the aristocratic system. Chris has led an extremely sheltered life since the time he was born. He was subject to every sort of propaganda, and as a patriot, decided to uphold the laws that he knew. As a result, when his world comes crumbling down before his eyes, he’s forced to re-evaluate everything that he thought he knew. In the end, he comes up with the troubling conclusion that he believes more in the rebel cause than he does in the aristocratic cause. The fact that Clare loses her life because of aristocratic values, everything is just topped it off for him. Because of this one incident and the information digging that resulted from it, he made the decision to become a rebel spy.

Clare – Christopher’s fiancé. Age 24. She has taken her calling as a doctor to a different standard than those around her. Kept secret from Christopher, Clare has been helping going down to the demilitarized zone in the 7^th Clover Division to treat injured rebels and underprivileged citizens. The 7^th Clover Rebel Division recognizes her as a friend, but never tell her anything. One day, she treats a young member of the rebel forces, new to the fighting. She leaks information to the rebels on that one occasion, and they use it to gain a foothold in a guarded location. Clare, who already is being watched by the main military government is assassinated by one of their agents.

Ezravan Jaimal – the new rebel leader after the death of Gail Taies. Age 25. Her ruthless nature has to do with her heritage. Her family once lived in the aristocratic system too, but since her father didn’t side with the views of commoner exclusion, they were exiled to life in the world of the less fortunate. Ezra doesn’t pity herself though. She considers herself to be lucky in many ways. Unlike many of the common people, she had an exceptional education. She understands the oppression that the people around her are under and won’t stand for it. At the age of fifteen when her mother passed away, she joined the rebels. Her father is her only living relative, but he shares her hatred for the aristocratic class, so he never gets around to stopping her. Ezra is tough because she has to be. Unlike some of the rebels (or even the aristocrats), she doesn’t enjoy killing. However, she also won’t think twice about pulling the trigger. Her policy on execution is that the person has to be threatening, awake, and armed in some fashion. Of course, she counts martial arts as a form of “armed,” so she’s been known to make exceptions in some cases where hand-to-hand combat was concerned. Contrary to popular belief in her rebel cell, she does have feelings. She will sooner admit defeat in a fight, than give in to harming a member of her cell or destroying something she is working hard for.

Andrew – Age 21. Chris’s best friend. Though he believes that some of the methods that the aristocratic system apply are wrong, he’s extremely loyal. He’s Clare’s assassin.

Vailease – She is the equivalent of a modern day NPC. The net has updated since the time of broadband, and what became of it was a series of locations based on virtual reality where a person can actually talk to a computerized person. The real difference though, is that Vailease, and others like her are intelligent programs. They think based on data they receive. They make friends based on how often a person talks to them. She is the one who ultimately tells Christopher about a good bulk of what really goes on between the rebels and the elite class. She also is the one who makes it possible for Christopher to find the rebels in the first place.

Pitch

In the year 2060, a global government is in power. Focusing on the immediate needs of the government and its best interest, the people have fallen through the cracks. Poverty has spread to the suburban areas of the world. The “perfect” world government has a daily power struggle with the people in the most targeted areas of change—the urban cities. Though living well for the most part, considering what they have, the common people have no rights. The homeless are shoved into government facilities with horrible conditions, made to work at places that are no more than a constant state of cruel slave labor.
This story begins with a man named Christopher Hilshire who is part of an elite police assassin’s unit. He works for the government, oblivious to the cries and hardships of the people due to his sheltered life as a member of a high status family in the government until one day his fiancé, Clare, is killed. His best friend Andrew admits to carrying out orders for her assassination. With his new found knowledge that his own unit was behind her execution, Christopher starts to dig for clues. What he finds is evidence that Clare was treating the common people, as well as the rebels. In order to find out her reason for helping, he digs deeper. What he finds ends up shaking his foundations so completely that it leads him to approach the rebel leader, Ezra, and ultimately change sides, becoming a spy for the rebels.

The original story is a work that I've started to write over the last year. This movie is to be based on the beginning event that triggers him to act as a spy for a specific rebel faction.

In order to get away from huge crowd scenes, camera shots are probably going to be kept fairly tight, focusing primarily on the faces of the main characters.

These images are a good example of the kind of shot I might want to try. I might even take this much further and get right up to the face.

Self Critique

So, the main complaints I had about my manifesto were: not forceful enough in some areas (change in tone), not necessary to read and listen to the same thing at the same time. There were also some things that people didn't understand. While I get why some areas may be confusing to other people, the whole thing makes perfect sense to me. I think what I thought this was, was a declaration of my overall beliefs as a filmmaker, not necessarily the exact direction I was heading. What I stated were true beliefs of mine, things that tick me off that other people do, and overall, just stuff that in my head make a good film.

There are a few parts that need to be revised now that I'm looking over them again. That isn't to say that it wasn't revised already though. I spent a good half hour nitpicking portions of the original content with another student until I viewed it as acceptable. That part of the process I am perfectly happy with.

One thing I really ended up not liking was just how straight forward and kind of boring that it ended up being. I'll take the hit for that. My idea seemed better in my head than it actually turned out. The reason I wanted text was so that people would pay attention more to what I was saying and interpret it. I didn't want visual distractions or something completely simple either. In my opinion there has to be happy medium. That's part of what film is about... making the content of the text and the image meaningful.

All in all, I think I need to narrow it down to what I really want to do with film, cut out everything else, and just go from there.